(CCU Student) One of the touchiest, most tip-toed-around issues today is the choice of abstinence until marriage. As the world becomes more tolerant and even encouraging of promiscuous behavior, many Christians are hard-pressed to remain strong in their stand of remaining pure until their wedding night. And then beyond that, there is the challenge to stay faithful throughout their marriage.
The issue is often overlooked, though, because of the possible embarrassment that may arise when parents give “the talk” to their children. So, instead, teenagers receive the secular world’s “YOLO” message (You Only Live Once) to live life to the fullest and do everything you can to have a good time. It is so critical that the road of increased teen pregnancies, sexually transmitted diseases and emotionally scarred lives not be traveled anymore.
Secular society has numbed people to the severity of infidelity. Through movies, television and music, the world laughs, jokes and nonchalantly comments about casual sex. The lives of real, ordinary people are transformed as they adopt the pattern portrayed on TV that sex is no big deal, has no consequences, whether physical, emotional, or relational, and is normal and fine to do outside a healthy marriage setting.
First of all, sex is a big deal. God created it to be the most intimate union any two people can have, and it was made to be between a husband and wife. To shrug off its importance is to discredit God’s workmanship.
To say there are no after-effects from sex outside of marriage is one of the most offensive lies culture has conjured. It questions our intelligence because there are going to be consequences. The obvious physical results of sex outside of marriage are unexpected pregnancy and STDs.
The emotional and relational consequences are often overlooked because they’re not as in the open as the physical effects. However, they are what drive people to keep looking for approval in all the wrong places and to continue in their promiscuous behavior. The regret, hurt, pain, embarrassment and entire range of emotions can be overbearing. The soiled reputation and lost relationships are also felt heavily by the victim.
God is strict in His word about the right time and setting for physical intimacy. Hebrews 13:4: “He knows the hurts it can cause if the act is taken out of its purposed place.” Yet God is always full of love, forgiveness, and compassion, and always offers the chance for redemption.
Christians need to make the teaching of sexual integrity a priority in their life. C.A.T.S. (Concerned about Teenage Sexuality) is a program in my hometown of Cedar Rapids, Iowa, bringing this message to middle and high schoolers. By being in a peer-to-peer mentoring group, teens are at ease when someone their age walks into their health-ed class to talk about sexual integrity.
Sex is sacred and precious and needs to remain in the context for which it was originally created. Although the world says it’s normal, fun and right to do what you want when you want to, the Lord challenges us to have self-control.
By having patience for His plan to work out in our lives, we’ll be ultimately blessed. Romans 12:2 sums up how we are to live: “Do not be conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may discern what is the good, pleasing and perfect will of God.”
Kelli Klaus is a Colorado Christian University freshman from Cedar Rapids, Iowa, and was a student delegate at Western Conservative Summit 2012. She wrote this for her hometown paper, The Gazette, where it appeared on Sept. 16.